Today's Issues

(In no specific order)

1. I need to get over my fear of intimacy with people in the service industry. Yes, it is unnerving that they are paid to act like they like you but I must learn to not be afraid. They’re false politeness is not a plot to slay me despite my sensing some inherent evil in most of them.
2. Public transport is not plebian. Eventually I may have to face the fact that riding the bus or metro is an aspect of city living that even I am not too good for. Also, riding the bus would provide ample time for reading powerful literature like the “twilight” series.
3. I may have to abandon the idea that someone is eventually going to finance the medical procedure necessary to make both of my breasts the same size. Although I still maintain that walking around with a c cup and an a cup is unnerving and not good for balance.
4. If today is seriously honestly only Tuesday…. There is no threat powerful enough to suggest how annoyed I am about this.
5. I do not actually have a real job
6. But I do have a blog? Where I am referred to interchangeably as ‘edamame’ and ‘california roll’….?
7. My cell phone is reportedly not going to work during inauguration week because of the massive influx of cell phone toting liberals
8. I need Christian Louboutin black patent leather 2 inch tall heels. And I need them to be free and to be delivered to me, also free of charge.